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　　Inthe2009film"UpintheAir,"NatalieKeenerdecidesshecannolongerstomachbeingpartofacorporatefiringsquadandquitsherfirm.Hermentor,playedbyGeorgeClooney,behavesasthemagnanimousgentweallknowhimtobe:hewritesaglowingreferenceletteronherbehalf,addressedsimply"towhomitmayconcern."

　　Intherealworld,gettingareferenceletterisfarmoredifficultandoftenasourceofmuchanxiety.Whomtoask,howtoask,whattosay?

　　Butgettinganoutstandingreferenceletterisentirelywithinyourcontrolandeasierthanyouthink,evenifyoudon'thaveabenevolentbenefactoratyourback.

　　Herearethreetipstoensureyourmentor,formerboss,oracademiccounselorwritesyouaravereview:

　　Highlighttheirqualifications

　　Provideatemplate

　　Offera"noquestionsasked"policy

　　Let'slookateachoftheseindividually:

　　HighlighttheirQualifications

　　Whenreachingouttoaskforaletterofreference,explainupfrontandcenterwhyitisthatyouvaluethatperson'sopinionandrespecttheirprofessionalexpertiseenoughsothatyouchosethem(ofallpeople)tovouchforyouinyournextprofessionalendeavor.

　　Beyondmereflattery,showwhyyouthinkthatpersonisuniquelyqualifiedtoaccuratelyassessandcommunicateyourpersonalcontributiontoyourfutureorganization.Whydidyouenjoyworkingforthem,andwhydoyouvaluetheiropinion?Whydoyoulookuptothem?Howdothequalitiesmatchyourown,orspeaktotheauthorityyouwantyourrecommendationtoconvey?

　　ProvideaTemplate

　　It'salmostimpossibletogetagoodreferenceletterfromsomeoneifyoudon'tprovidethetoolsnecessaryforthemtoactuallywriteagoodletter.It'salsoterriblyinconsideratenottogiveampleguidance.Thelastthinganyonewantstodoisspendhoursordaysthinkingaboutanddraftingaletterwhichyouyourselfcouldhavecomposedfarbetterandmorereadilyinabouthalfthetime.

　　Providingatemplate,therefore—anoutline,bulletpoints,orevenafully-bakeddraft—ofwhatyou'dlikethereferencelettertosayisthemosteffective(nottomentiongenerousandthoughtful)approachtoaskingforaletterofreference.Thegoalisn'ttoputwordsintoyourformercolleague'smouthortoco-optherintovouchingforyouinanuntrueordisingenuousmanner;it'ssimplytodosomeoftheworkforherandprovideallofthepertinentdatapointsthatyou'dlikeincludedintheletter.Moreover,asboastful,braggingorfullofyourselfyoumayfeelwritingyourownreferral,oftenpeoplewillbeevenmoregenerousthanyouwillwhentalkingaboutyourskillsandcontributiontoanorganization.Sogoaheadandtootyourownhorn.

　　"NoQuestionsAsked"

　　Finally,onceyouprovideyourreviewerwithausefultemplateandmakeitclearthatyourintentionistomakethisprocessaspainlessaspossibleforher,thenit'stimetohandoverthereinsandoffera"noquestionsasked"policy.First,giveyourcolleagueaneasy"out"todeclineyourrequestforanyornoreason.Then,assumingsheagrees,giveherampleleewaytochange,modifyoredityourletterassheseesfit.Youwanttoconveyasenseoftrustinherandgiveheranopportunitytowritealettersheisentirelycomfortablewith.

　　Let'stakealookatwhatthisrequestmightactuallylooklike:

　　HighlighttheirQualificati