大家看看我这偏雅思大作文可以拿几分?要按雅思的评分标准来的啊要求是：Theunlimiteduseofcarsmaycausemanyproblems.Whataretheseproblems?Inordertoreducetheproblems,shouldwediscouragepeoplefromusingca

　　大家看看我这偏雅思大作文可以拿几分?

　　要按雅思的评分标准来的啊

　　要求是：Theunlimiteduseofcarsmaycausemanyproblems.Whataretheseproblems?Inordertoreducetheproblems,shouldwediscouragepeoplefromusingcars?

　　Givereasonsforyouranswerandincludeanyrelevantexamplesfromyourownknowledgeorexperience.

　　我的文章如下：Usingcarsisinevitableinourlives.Itisconvenienttotakeyoutoeverywhere,nottomention,usingitgotowork.However,wemustdealwithsomeseriousproblemswiththedevelopmentofusingcars.Theairpollutionisseriousinsomeinternationalcities,suchasTokyo,NewYorkandShanghai.Theexhuastgasfromcarsmaketheairworseandworse.Inmyopinion,thegovernmentshouldrestrictusingcarsandinvocatetogotoworkbybusortube.Itisagoodwaytoprotecttheenvironment.Gulangyu,asmallislandinXiamen,Iwenttotherelastsummer.Thegovernmentdowellintheenvironment.Youcan'tseeanycarsorbusesinthissamllisland.Thegovernmentlessenthedegreeoftheairpollution.Tomymind,wemustlearnittoimporve.Beyondthat,usingcarscancausethetrafficjams.Exampleisintheperiodofcommuting,wecanseeitiscrowdinginsomecross-road.Inthiscase,frommypointofview,wecangotoworkbybikeinsteadofcars.Itcankeepusfitwellanditcansavetime.What'smore,itsavetheresourcesandprotecttheenvironment.

　　Speakingofthis,maybesomeonesayweshouldgiveupusingcars.Furthermore,Idon'tagreewiththisarguement.Sometimes,usingcarscangiveusmanyconvenience.Forinstance,ifsomeonehavesomethingergenttodo,heshouldownaprivatecar.Itcanhelphimtoeverywhere.Apartfromthat,nowadaysmanypeopleworkatmakingcars,dirvingcarsorfillingupgas.EspeciallyinUSA,oneoutofsixpeopleworkaboutcars.

　　Inconclusion,usingcarshavebothadvantagesanddisadvantages.Furthermore,wecan'tdiscourageit.Anyway,therearemuchproblems.Weshoulddoourbesttochangeit.

　　大家给我评个分,顺便点评一下好了

　　三楼给出我大概可以拿几分？谢谢